Learning, Accepting, Healing and Avoiding

They say time heals all. But if your depending on time, and time alone to do the healing than your mistaken by the meaning..

The only way to heal is to guide yourself through the process of healing. Grief, mourning, closure, accepting and moving on for example. And in time with this process you will be able to go forth without doubt, sadness or regret.

This is for everything. If you have been wronged in any way, this also applies. Although i find that people use this as an excuse to behave and act the way they do. Such as hatred and anger. People like this are constantly negative and will bring as many people into their little world as they can manipulate. In doing so they are able to turn them and mold them into what this person is. Human behavior.

People are followers and very few are leaders. And with that, the ones who do lead should always lead in a positive way to have an inspirational impact on the world around them. If not, well we know what would happen..

You don't need me to explain to you why people are the way they are, you know this already. It always starts from the beginning. The first breath you took, the first steps you walked, the first game you played. all this is part of the role of who you are now. Our past is our most influential impact as to who we are today. Which is still not an excuse to become of the evil type.

For example. If one was beaten growing up, or around prostitution, taken advantage of, bullied as a kid, and so on. This person has two choices. They can take what happened to them and what they saw and turn it around and make their life opposite and as positive and loving as possible. And yes the ability is there as well as the potential.

But the other choice is why we have the society we do today. People take their past and bend it in a way so that it still is the present for them. They want payback, revenge. Do you think people become sociopaths because they were loved too much? These type of people lose the power of emotion and the one that they usually find themselves feeling is anger and the role of anger usually goes to hatred. I can only imagine how many can say they have x amount of haters, but have no idea why..

Well if your a happy person, wouldn't you think that someone who knows nothing of happiness will see this and envy it. If you have love, this person will either see you as weak, or be jealous of it because they wonder why they can't find it themselves. they even question if they are capable of loving or being loved. If your positive, down to earth and stable, you are the envy of most. So wouldn't it be warranted to say that one would see you as a threat? You are better than them and whats the best way to break someone down.. The answer is emotionally. Physical is too temporary, but emotional, if worked on, you can break someone to the point of them questioning them self. and That's where understanding comes into play.

You have someone who bothers you, bullies you in any way, stalks you or hates on you in some way, so on.. This is what they are trying to do. break you. But you need to ask yourself, who are they really breaking down in the process. We all know that words said are words about yourself. Where else would they come from.So whatever you hear is not really about you, its about the person saying them.

You have to remember your beliefs, because they get attacked, but if you believe in them as you should you will be able to let whatever is said or done go and feel remorse for that person trying to break them. You need to understand who you are as a person. If your happy, know why and i say this because the people who will hate on this will find out why. They will find your strengths and target your weaknesses. So if your prepared and you know both as i have said before, you will be able to withstand the crap that comes out of ones mouth. You know why your happy. you know your loved and/or you love. you know what you have and don't have, your wants and needs. you know where your from and you know your past; and the past is another i want to get into to in a bit.

So do you know who's who and who to watch out for?

Someone who is hateful and negative will come off as too upbeat. too happy and it will seem as though they try to hard to please. They will put this false facade on so that others don't notice their misery. You need to understand who these people are and start noticing the people around you. i bet if you start really looking, you will be able to pick some out within seconds. You need to be able to notice that they whine a lot and will take something that was done to them and Never let it go, which means you will hear of it A LOT, in one way or another. Usually a name you will hear a lot as well. (If they tried to break someone and failed, they will never get over this person or stop trying to hurt them in some way, so their name will pop up a lot along with a string of lies that really don't make much sense.)

If you understand how these people are, than you will be less likely to fall victim to them. You will see bully tendencies, or them trying too hard to be a leader but never leading. you will notice them picking up others behaviors (copying) whether its words, clothes, the way the talk and act, so on. even the way they dress. Remember these people are so lost, so instead of looking for themselves (because they blame the world for being how and who they are not themselves) they target others and will try to be them. even use them in many ways.

So lets go back to the past. when you fall victim, you need to know that your past will be used against you. It may be nothing but it will be turned into something, and usually enough to break someones spirit and discourage them. You have seen the suicide rates, and to me it breaks my heart. These kids, teens and adults are used and broken down during it.

Believe it or not, Haters, bullies and so on will seek you out to friend you. Whats the best way to break someone but to show them great friendship and than start slowly on breaking you down till you start questioning. and that's why I'm giving you ideas as to who and what these people are, and I'm telling you exactly what and who their going to target.

Remember your past was the past for a reason. It remains to be that way. its your choice to start re-evaluating it, but nothing good comes of it. Its called the past for a reason. your present is more important. think of it as what its called, a gift. and your future depends on what you do today, not what you did yesterday.

There is no one reason people like this do what they do, but you have an idea of some of them. You have a way of picking them out. And you have a way of knowing if your becoming a target, will become a target or already are. You now have the power to defeat it and not question what they want you to question and remember who you are.

Be you and be successful in all you do. Never care what others think or say. Take the positive and try to stray from the negative. And if you see someone being hurt don't turn your cheek, do something, say something. What if that person was you..

Be a leader but be a rightful one. Remember always, i can't press this enough, that its takes so much energy and time to become a bully, hater or whatever you want to call them, than is to just be happy and do what you need and want to do.

A.~